Some dreams you have to let go

YOU, yes YOU.
th one reading my blog now with a guilty conscience knowing tht im gonna blog about how disappointed im with you right now.
no, nt jst right now. i dont knw whre i ve collected so much of a patience nd yet not giving up.
its jst ... nt th right time. i know wht im doing, every single bit i know. its three nd a quarter heart down.

no words can describe how im feelin' now. why is it yet again a disappointment? a smth you can keep up with again? whts with those empty words ... you double promised its gonna work?
i ve so many questions mark up my mind now. i hav no answers to them. you took me in again nd again nd stabb hard into my heart. tht passionate blind heart.

im not crying, not at all. im so afraid, i dont know why arent i tearing at all? i dont like this feeling. it feels sooo numb to everything. i don wanna be numb to anything, i dont want. cuz it goes to mean im letting go bit by bit every now nd then. NO! it shouldnt be this way. i still wanna feel more tormented, torn apart. i wanna know i ve been thru when im practically through with destiny.

all i know, im to blame. i spoilt this child to th extend i no longer own any rights to thee. nd thre i see myself being in a state of helpless. nt in a way being bullied. but seriously not cherished. i ve been repeating myself too many times, i dont think this is gonna affect u at all.
but yes, im taken for granted. i nvr did self-doubt in this.

u need lectures. not only lectures, u need more than jst these. u need to feel it in u how im feelin right now. cuz it seems like u nvr understood ur mistakes but lookin proud with them. nd god knows its not fair to me.

i ve so much to say, but im lack of th strength. i need rest